Grendku Awards Ceremony
Beowo1|='s 'ku Zot-Zot presents us with the belief that heat is an irritant or contaminant to be cleaned from our summer air. Sign me up as a card-carrying member of the Clan of the Summer Sultry Air Filtration. Beo's award this week is The Toxic Torpor to Taintless Temperature Award.
G Dawney's internal heat regulation appears to be a bit touchy in her contribution PermaSwelter. Unfortunately little can be done to help this affliction. Unless one wishes to become a nudist or move to a chilly climate. Accordingly G Dawney receives the If Only I Were Naked in Northern Manitoba Award.
dewdew sings the joys of having a chick in a convertable wearing no shirt with the AC on.. wait a second, I think I misread that. Lemme try another one... dewdew praises his homestate's claim to fame in You Punk-Bastards In Other Hot States Owe Us Eternally. The powers that be are granting him the illustrious pair of Ever the Artic Educator Award for this Grendku and Making the Judge Create a Personal Imaginary Naughty Perky Movie in His Head Award for the one previously mentioned.
Jesster's post traumatic vacation heat stress surfaces in The French Chef Cookbook Addendum: Cooking the Kids Made Easy - an Ode to Julia "Hannibal Lechter" Childs. As her parents never got around to getting her fully baked and actually eating her she will be able to receive the Hazardous Holiday of Heatstroke Survivalist Award.
Serra shows us some backbone in her refusal to pay for AC in her automobile in her Grendku I am calling Windows Rolled Down. It's all about the economics, and so her award Gimmie the 91 Gallons Instead, speaks to this. And yes, I averaged it out at $2 a gallon roughly which I know may or may be the going rate but I like easy math. Sue me. Wait, please don't. I'm sure there is some unemployed lawyer out there willing to take the case.
DC pines for her central air when she's away in her haiku Frigid Fantasies. We all feel it from time to time. That dreaded separation anxiety that kicks in when we've been away from our cooling units too long. The symptoms creep in slowly.. sweat glands dripping, pinkish skin slowly frying. DC picks up the No Amount Too Ample for Artic Affluence Award. (technical note, Grendkus have a 7-5-7 structure, Haikus have a 5-7-5 structure)
Paula takes me on a headtrip with Deep Freeze. I mean we've all heard of people using their fridges as air conditioners before, but what type of a maladjusted miscreant would think to try to use their AC to chill beverages and store dairy products? Sadly Paula there are those out there to take conditioned air to extremes. Feel free to reprogram them with this award: The Hockey Stick of Attitude and Temperature Management. They won't feel cold if they are unconscious. That's a promise. High sticking encouraged.
PRP appears to be forgetting that people actually pay good money for saunas in her Grendku, Jeep Spa. Bowls, warm rocks and a little water, yer in the money. And I want a cut for the idea. Say $2.13. Fair is fair. PRP wins the first ever Grendku Exemplifying Entrepreneurial Excellence Award. Probably the last too.
A* illustrates her weatherly worldly travels in her pair of 'kus Tales of Two Tropical Cities. Is there anywhere it isn't warm these days?? Yeesh. Keeping yet again with the metallic theme, I render unto you the Copper Coil of the Cooling Unit Award. You are a veritable metal magnet in the awards ceremonies it would appear.
And MooCow pulls in the rear. And he put the last Grendku in as well. *smooches MooCow* Well how can I not bestow magnificent bejeweled awards upon any Grendku (or haiku in this instance) that references my pants? Well, other than because I don't have any... Hey! I have some navel lint though! Whoot! Perfect! MooCow, for your Grendku which I am most likely to call Grend31's Pants, I give unto you This Lovingly Lifted Lock of Lager-Leavened Lint.
G Dawney's internal heat regulation appears to be a bit touchy in her contribution PermaSwelter. Unfortunately little can be done to help this affliction. Unless one wishes to become a nudist or move to a chilly climate. Accordingly G Dawney receives the If Only I Were Naked in Northern Manitoba Award.
dewdew sings the joys of having a chick in a convertable wearing no shirt with the AC on.. wait a second, I think I misread that. Lemme try another one... dewdew praises his homestate's claim to fame in You Punk-Bastards In Other Hot States Owe Us Eternally. The powers that be are granting him the illustrious pair of Ever the Artic Educator Award for this Grendku and Making the Judge Create a Personal Imaginary Naughty Perky Movie in His Head Award for the one previously mentioned.
Jesster's post traumatic vacation heat stress surfaces in The French Chef Cookbook Addendum: Cooking the Kids Made Easy - an Ode to Julia "Hannibal Lechter" Childs. As her parents never got around to getting her fully baked and actually eating her she will be able to receive the Hazardous Holiday of Heatstroke Survivalist Award.
Serra shows us some backbone in her refusal to pay for AC in her automobile in her Grendku I am calling Windows Rolled Down. It's all about the economics, and so her award Gimmie the 91 Gallons Instead, speaks to this. And yes, I averaged it out at $2 a gallon roughly which I know may or may be the going rate but I like easy math. Sue me. Wait, please don't. I'm sure there is some unemployed lawyer out there willing to take the case.
DC pines for her central air when she's away in her haiku Frigid Fantasies. We all feel it from time to time. That dreaded separation anxiety that kicks in when we've been away from our cooling units too long. The symptoms creep in slowly.. sweat glands dripping, pinkish skin slowly frying. DC picks up the No Amount Too Ample for Artic Affluence Award. (technical note, Grendkus have a 7-5-7 structure, Haikus have a 5-7-5 structure)
Paula takes me on a headtrip with Deep Freeze. I mean we've all heard of people using their fridges as air conditioners before, but what type of a maladjusted miscreant would think to try to use their AC to chill beverages and store dairy products? Sadly Paula there are those out there to take conditioned air to extremes. Feel free to reprogram them with this award: The Hockey Stick of Attitude and Temperature Management. They won't feel cold if they are unconscious. That's a promise. High sticking encouraged.
PRP appears to be forgetting that people actually pay good money for saunas in her Grendku, Jeep Spa. Bowls, warm rocks and a little water, yer in the money. And I want a cut for the idea. Say $2.13. Fair is fair. PRP wins the first ever Grendku Exemplifying Entrepreneurial Excellence Award. Probably the last too.
A* illustrates her weatherly worldly travels in her pair of 'kus Tales of Two Tropical Cities. Is there anywhere it isn't warm these days?? Yeesh. Keeping yet again with the metallic theme, I render unto you the Copper Coil of the Cooling Unit Award. You are a veritable metal magnet in the awards ceremonies it would appear.
And MooCow pulls in the rear. And he put the last Grendku in as well. *smooches MooCow* Well how can I not bestow magnificent bejeweled awards upon any Grendku (or haiku in this instance) that references my pants? Well, other than because I don't have any... Hey! I have some navel lint though! Whoot! Perfect! MooCow, for your Grendku which I am most likely to call Grend31's Pants, I give unto you This Lovingly Lifted Lock of Lager-Leavened Lint.
2 Comments:
Whoops! Guess I missed the rules post. Ah well, I've always been a non-conformist...even when trying to conform :)
No, not sue the nice Grend31 unit! It's nice just to be mentioned.
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